Well thats not disturbing at all.

Guess what Mitzy, I have been stalking you so closely that I know today is your birthday. I have been secret about it too, you have absolutely no idea who I am or where I live.
Ben Stevenson in west virginia

dear ben,
i'm so honored. i think. should i be?
-mitzy

The Pen is Dead

What happens if you put a pen into a really high powered pencil sharpener that's electric

Dave guy in Goron

Dear Dave guy,

I haven't tried it, but (i think) it will blow up! Yay! Blowing up stuff is fun!

-Mitzy

Yay!!!

Mitzy has reached 100 posts! Comment on why the number 100 is awesome!!!
-Mitzy

Yay!!! There Isn't Timeo On My Hands!

I sent you a question and you answered it a few hours later. You must have a lot of free timeo n your hands.

Hal 8999 in Oregon, de Portland.

Dear Hal 8999,

Yes, I do answer questions quickly. But I don't know what timeo is, whatever it is, it's not on my hands.

-Mitzy

Hehe...

Is it true you are possessed by the dark and powerful egyptian goddess Mitzaous?


Dear Anonymous,
Only on the weekends.
-Mitzy (aka Mitzaous)

Soggy Marajuana...

Hello I would like you to help me get drugnked out, a mixture of drunk and drugged out. Do you know were I could purchase an item to help me get Drugnked Out?


Dear Anonymous,
Hmm... that's a new one. I don't no, maybe you could get some dope dip it in alcohol and smoke it. (could be flammable) Seems like a good idea to me!
-Mitzy

I Hate This Squirrel.

The evil squirrel in NYC is back, and he likes tie-dye. Again, if anyone sees a squirrel with a bazooka in a tie-dye t-shirt contact the authorities immediately.

If it helps here is his mugshot. (sans bazooka and tie-dye apparel)

-Mitzy

Wait a few more hours...

are you possibly possessed by a demon/dark god?

Dear ......,

Not at the moment.

-Mitzy

Pwom Questions

Dear Mitzy,
I werz wonwing if u wouuldd gggo tu da pwom withh me?!)$&#% givee mee some crackk! Ow $&*% I brung u giftt uv mary juana!!!
-- pweeze, Guam


Dear pweeze,
First of all, I'm in my 40's so, no. Second of all, what is mary juana? Also, no I won't give you crack or go to the pwom with you, whatever that is.
-Mitzy

omg! Like Iowa.

dear mitzy
me and my like bff r like 16 and were like goin 2 iowa like n a motel with like no cell service omg what should i like do n iowa there is like nothin 2 do up there like what should i like do
tiffany la
btw my parents are like with us omg ikr

Dear Tiffany in L.A.,
I think you should enjoy the outdoors. Forget about your cellular telephone and play outside with your best friend forever. No electronics. Hope I helped!
-Mitzy

Stalking Girlfriend!

What should I do if my girlfriend is stalking me?
That Guy

Dear That Guy,
If your girlfriend is stalking you, you should make yourself so unattractive and anyway likeable to keep her away! (If stalking is at an unhealthy level pickle juice is neccessary.) You may lose a few friends but it is all worth it!

Mitzy