Hibernation Awakened! (it rhymes, ok!)

zzzz......
(smack).............
knife............
facelift.........
stab............
wound.........
burn alive......

kill...........

ritual dance.......

ice cream.....

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.........

yawn...........

Mitzy has awakened from her spring hibernation! I'm now back on, and if there has been anything I missed, it will be answered now. Now here is a picture that came up on my "Zemanta Assistant" Media Gallery.

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

I'm Not Good With Big Words :(

Do you share my opinion that hoarding money gives one long-term unsatisfaction and depression?

Des mois guy in Des Mois, Iowa 

Dear Des Mois Guy,

ehhhh... sure.

-Mitzy

Yay!!!

Mitzy has reached 100 posts! Comment on why the number 100 is awesome!!!
-Mitzy

Zephyrs???

How many roads must a man walk down before we can call him a man?


Dear Anonymous,
The answer, my friend, is blowin' in the wind.
-Mitzy

More Than I Can Count...

How many different people have written to you, thousnds, hundreds, 5?  

Name not shown

Dear Name not shown,

ehhh... a lot?
-Mitzy

So Many Questions...

Oh no! I have influenza type B and strep throat. Also, I have a question about bubbles.

Anitionalkidrahems in  London, the country that london  is in

Dear Anonymous,

I'm sorry about your influenza type B and strep throat. There is no question about bubbles here. I don't know whatever a anitio... oh whatever, is. What about London?

So, from that I got that you were sick, you are curious about bubbles. Also, I looked up Anitionalkidrahems and there are no Google matches, not one. And you are in England.

-Mitzy

I Had To Look This One Up...

How many milliseconds are in an hour?'


Dear Anonymous,
There are 3.6 million milliseconds in an hour. (according to google calculators)
-Mitzy

The Art of Giving a Dog a Hot Dog covered in Anti-Freeze

Sorry if your questions from this week aren't answered Mitzy and her associates are going to a convention called "The Art of Giving a Dog a Hot Dog covered in Anti-Freeze" in DC. We will be back on Saturday.
-Mitzy

Hehe...

Is it true you are possessed by the dark and powerful egyptian goddess Mitzaous?


Dear Anonymous,
Only on the weekends.
-Mitzy (aka Mitzaous)

Soggy Marajuana...

Hello I would like you to help me get drugnked out, a mixture of drunk and drugged out. Do you know were I could purchase an item to help me get Drugnked Out?


Dear Anonymous,
Hmm... that's a new one. I don't no, maybe you could get some dope dip it in alcohol and smoke it. (could be flammable) Seems like a good idea to me!
-Mitzy

I Hate This Squirrel.

The evil squirrel in NYC is back, and he likes tie-dye. Again, if anyone sees a squirrel with a bazooka in a tie-dye t-shirt contact the authorities immediately.

If it helps here is his mugshot. (sans bazooka and tie-dye apparel)

-Mitzy

I Once Had A Slave...

What should I do if there is some over-sized pothead that hangs out in front off  my locker every 6th period right before Algebra when I need my books the most

Scared in new hampshire

Dear Scared,

Well what shouldn't you do? Potheads can be fun to mess around with. Next time, ask him to bring you you're books and be your own, personal slave. Good luck!

-Mitzy

Friendly Wolves!

I'm cold and there are wolves after me


Dear Cold,
The best thing to do would be to try to make friends with them. try shaking their paw and see their reaction. If that doesn't work out, you are too late.
-Mitzy

Blah, Blah, Blah.

I have a worm. He is green. he has an eye. It is yellow. He has 4 hairs. He has commented on Melanie doesn't care. He says eeeeeeee eeeeeeee eeeeee eeeeeee eeeeeeeee  eee e eee   eee e  e eee  eseee ee e e e e h  e ee e e. He Bounces.


Dear Anonymous,
I don't care.
-Mitzy

My Ninjas Will Hunt You Down.

Dear Mitzy,

I have written to you many times and you haven't responded. What gives you freaking jerk?

Dear Anonymous,

I don't like being called bad names. There will be my personal army of ninjas at your front door in less than 24 hours.

Mitzy

Sticks are Fun!

Dear Mitzy,

Your counter-part melanie is repeatedly ignoring my annoying comments about my worm. what should I do? 

Dear Anonymous, 
Poke her with a stick.

"Vacationing"

Sorry! I'm back. I was a convicted felon on the run... wait ehhh I mean I was vacationing in Hawaii. Anyway, I'm back!

She's is Trying to Ruin you Life!

My principle just gave me a long talk about not doing drugs. I think she's on something. What should I do?

Dear Anonymous,

Are you really going to listen to your principal? It sounds like she is trying to ruin your life, somehow. Drugs dull your senses and make you feel good. Why would you give up that? Sure, it's illegal and "harmful" for your health, but it is worth it. Don't you think?

-Mitzy

Pot!

Goldfish Ice Cream?

My cat eats my goldfish crackers and puts out a fowl odor. What should I do? Should i feed him real goldfish?
-Anonymous


Dear Anonymous, 
Since the cat is producing odors, maybe you should  take him to go get ice cream. Yeah, I don't know why. It's just right now I'm craving ice cream. So bring me some too!!!
-Mitzy

Do You Have Crazy Cat Restraining Neighbors?

Help Mitzy!!!
My cat has been stalking my neighbors. It wasn't a problem until they filed a restraining order... on my cat.
What should I do?
-Cat Crazy in CT

Dear Cat Crazy,
You might want to try sitting down and talking with your neighbor about your feelings and your cat's feelings or, you could do it the Mitzy way. The Mitzy way involves wrapping your neighbors house in toilet paper, humiliating him/her on a social networking site (Facebook, Twitter, MySpace) or on a blog. Then, you file a restraining order on THEM... (First find a good reason)
-Mitzy