Friendly Wolves!

I'm cold and there are wolves after me


Dear Cold,
The best thing to do would be to try to make friends with them. try shaking their paw and see their reaction. If that doesn't work out, you are too late.
-Mitzy

Blah, Blah, Blah.

I have a worm. He is green. he has an eye. It is yellow. He has 4 hairs. He has commented on Melanie doesn't care. He says eeeeeeee eeeeeeee eeeeee eeeeeee eeeeeeeee  eee e eee   eee e  e eee  eseee ee e e e e h  e ee e e. He Bounces.


Dear Anonymous,
I don't care.
-Mitzy

My Ninjas Will Hunt You Down.

Dear Mitzy,

I have written to you many times and you haven't responded. What gives you freaking jerk?

Dear Anonymous,

I don't like being called bad names. There will be my personal army of ninjas at your front door in less than 24 hours.

Mitzy

Sticks are Fun!

Dear Mitzy,

Your counter-part melanie is repeatedly ignoring my annoying comments about my worm. what should I do? 

Dear Anonymous, 
Poke her with a stick.

Spanish is Old. Seychellois Creole is the New Fad!

HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the spanish alphabet has changed    

nyay  waco, TX

Dear nyay,

What is the point of knowing spanish? I find knowing Seychellois Creole (look it up.) more useful to know.
-Mitzy

I Like Dogs.

Wazzup M

Wares yo fav spot to chillax? 





Dear Anonymous,
Chihuahua, Mexico. The dog is cool and I get cheap drugs... and some illegal weapons. :)

"Vacationing"

Sorry! I'm back. I was a convicted felon on the run... wait ehhh I mean I was vacationing in Hawaii. Anyway, I'm back!

Capture the Flag!

Yay!!!

I have some stuff that I don't want, do you want it?

Dear ____,

Sure. Only if it includes lethal weapons!!!

Mitzy

I'm Just a Bit Short...

Dear Mitzy I know you did that action with that object to that person. I know the reason you did it, so give me $5009.87 or else I will tell the law enforcement.


Dear anonymous,
I know what you're talking about... very specific. I would give you the money but I only have saved up $5009.86 for this type of occasion. Sorry!
-Mitzy

She's is Trying to Ruin you Life!

My principle just gave me a long talk about not doing drugs. I think she's on something. What should I do?

Dear Anonymous,

Are you really going to listen to your principal? It sounds like she is trying to ruin your life, somehow. Drugs dull your senses and make you feel good. Why would you give up that? Sure, it's illegal and "harmful" for your health, but it is worth it. Don't you think?

-Mitzy

Pot!

Goldfish Ice Cream?

My cat eats my goldfish crackers and puts out a fowl odor. What should I do? Should i feed him real goldfish?
-Anonymous


Dear Anonymous, 
Since the cat is producing odors, maybe you should  take him to go get ice cream. Yeah, I don't know why. It's just right now I'm craving ice cream. So bring me some too!!!
-Mitzy

Do You Have Crazy Cat Restraining Neighbors?

Help Mitzy!!!
My cat has been stalking my neighbors. It wasn't a problem until they filed a restraining order... on my cat.
What should I do?
-Cat Crazy in CT

Dear Cat Crazy,
You might want to try sitting down and talking with your neighbor about your feelings and your cat's feelings or, you could do it the Mitzy way. The Mitzy way involves wrapping your neighbors house in toilet paper, humiliating him/her on a social networking site (Facebook, Twitter, MySpace) or on a blog. Then, you file a restraining order on THEM... (First find a good reason)
-Mitzy

Ahhh.... Help!!!!

MESSAGE TO MITZY VIEWERS
**************************************************************************

Help! The squirrel with the bazooka has taken over my blog for using his photo!!!! He is randomly changing my backgrounds and he has held me hostage! If you see a squirrel with a weapon running around Times Square, contact the authorities immediately!
-Mitzy

 +  = TROUBLE

Just a Few Requirements...

give me paperclips!




Dear _____,
Did you know that we are now selling paperclips in the MitzyStore? Check it out! Plus, if you buy one today, you get another FREE!
-Mitzy