Dear Mitzy,
Recently, I have been sorting through my old things in my attic and noticed that I have an unwanted buildup of 24k gold jewelry, bracelets, and other assorted gold items. Many amazing services, such as Cash Loans for Car Titles (formerly Wienerschnitzel) and the DIVORCE guy's law firm on Waco Drive, are now offering services to melt down my gold and pay me handsomely for it.
Being a dealer of the same, uh, quality of the other two that I've mentioned, do you buy gold?
Love,
Lazarus Waco, TX
Dear Lazarus,
No.
-Mitzy
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